Manwhore’s whores: Not me!

This has been an insane week.  I almost started to think it was Pop-Up Men time again, but it seems to have stopped at two.  (I didn’t count Harry because he showed back up last week.)  It started out with, are you ready for this?  Manwhore.  Yes, the very same Manwhore who got married to the Chicago Gold-Digger less than two months ago.  At first I thought it was going to just be a text asking me to do some website work for him or something, but I was wrong.  I was very wrong.

Manwhore sent me a few texts and then told me that he would be back down here in about a week.  He asked if I wanted to come see him while he’s back in town.  I was in shock.  Has he really started cheating on her this soon after getting married?  And if so, then why?  Instead of wondering, I asked him.  He said that he hasn’t cheated on her.  This confused me even more.  Why would he take that step into adultery with me of all people?  His answer?

“I’ve just always at some point seen you and we ended up fucking.“

How’s that for disturbing?  After all this time, and all my progress in trying to move on and get past that chapter in my life, he still thinks he can just pop up and I’ll come running to fuck him.  Well, surprise, surprise…I’m not that weak “girl-in-love” anymore.  I answered:

“It’s taken me a long time to get over you.  I think it would be counter productive for me to come and fuck you now.”

I know it’s probably not the anger-filled reply that you might have expected, but I was trying to take the high road and be as polite as possible about it.  There’s no need for me to stoop to his level anymore.  I have overcome!  This is real progress folks!

The next man to pop back up was my second ex-husband, The Ox.  I know I haven’t told you much about him, and I plan to rectify that very soon, but here’s what happened this week.  I was at work Wednesday and got a text from The Ox.  That isn’t unusual.  We still text each other occasionally, and I still consider him a friend.   However, this text was different.

“Would you wanna get back together?”

Keep in mind that The Ox and I have been divorced for almost five years now.  We were only together a total of four years.  Even though I loved him, I have to admit that it was a doomed relationship.  When I got that text from him, I didn’t know if he was joking with me or being serious.  He has a tendency to be very sarcastic and never very serious about anything.  So I asked him if he was being serious.  He said that this time he was.  I told him that I didn’t think it was a good idea, and that some things are best left alone.  Again, I tried to be as nice as possible with my rejection text.

Why?! Why would anyone want this?!

Maybe the universe is just playing some sick joke on me.  It can’t be normal for men to keep going back to a woman from their past like this.  Is it?  I sometimes wonder if I radiate some kind of vibes, or pheromones, or something, and I don’t realize it.  There has to be an explanation for it.  Maybe it’s just the power of the pussy that keeps them coming back for more.  That sounds conceited, I know, but don’t forget…I’m the Cock Master. 

Happy humping!

Old Habits Die Hard

*This is probably the tenth version of this post.  I keep starting and then stuff keeps happening. LOL

Well, I did it.  I finished reading my first book in fifteen years.  And that book is Fifty Shades of Grey.  Sad isn’t it?  The ending just pissed me off.  Then my sister told me that I had to read the second book for it all to make sense.  So I started reading Fifty Shades Darker and was somewhat appeased, if only temporarily.

I got a few chapters in, and just got bored with it all over again.  I do declare though, that I will finish these damned books if it’s the last thing I do.

Moving on.

Damn it all to hell!  I’m so frustrated with myself and with men.*  It’s my fault.  Maybe the monogamy thing isn’t for me after all.  I don’t say that because I’ve recently cheated on anyone.  In fact, I made it a point to tell the person I’ve been seeing that monogamy is very difficult for me and that I probably wouldn’t be able to do it given my history with men and relationships.  Actually why I told him that was because I still had high hopes that I would still get to see “the one I really want” occasionally.  That hasn’t happened though, so I’ve been forced to move on.

It is even more difficult for me to stay monogamous when I’m not in love with the person who I’m seeing.  When I’m with someone I am in love with then I rarely feel the need to check out how much greener the grass is on the other side of that imaginary fence.  Since there is no fence, and all the grass around here seems to be dead, I’m just going to graze wherever the hell I want.

*I noticed earlier in the week that Endymion had removed me from his friends on Facebook.  I sent him a message asking it he was upset with me.  His reply?  “I’m not anything with you. You might as well live in China.”  That made me a little sad to think that I had probably hurt his feelings by not coming to visit him since I moved.  He does know of at least one time that I’ve been back to New Orleans since then, but I didn’t tell him it was to visit my “friend.”  It’s probably a good thing that he unfriended me though.  I seriously doubt I’ll ever move back to N.O. and while it was fun, that chapter is over.

Since I’ve been thinking about monogamy a lot lately, it seems only fitting that I finally gave in and agreed to meet the Golfer for lunch after four years of his messaging me.  When I first met him back in 2008 I was freshly divorced, but he was married so we didn’t do a lot other than making out.  I guess the guilt of cheating on my ex-husband made me more inclined to not help someone else become a cheater.  So I quickly put an end to our little affair.

He is a persistent man though, and I suppose he just finally caught me in the right mood and I gave in.  I met him for lunch last Monday.  I still hadn’t planned on doing anything with him, but things happen.  Hormones kick in.  Lust takes over.  You know the rest.  What I remember most was how he kept saying he was being

Your Presence is Requested…

I got a text from Manwhore’s business partner yesterday telling me that a map on one of the brochures was wrong.  She asked nicely if I would fix it and then upload it to Vistaprint again.  Since I’ve already been paid for the work, I agreed to fix it.  I know I said I was finished working for Manwhore, but because it was her and not him who contacted me, I agreed to do it.

I got it done and then logged in to their Vistaprint account.  On the front page of the website it always shows a link to your portfolio after you log in.  It also shows the most recent item that you’ve created.  I noticed a very nicely designed invitation card.  When I clicked on it to see an enlarged image, my jaw hit the floor.

Chicago Gold-Digger & Manwhore

Request the Honour of Your Presence At Our

 Wedding 

 ***

December 12, 2012

at 12:00 noon

Yep, you read that right.  He’s doing it again.  This will make unhappy number 7.  Honestly, I don’t know what to say about this new tidbit of information.  I can’t say I’m surprised.  I’m only surprised he didn’t do it sooner.  However, I will be surprised if he actually makes to the 12/12/12 at 12 wedding.

Regarding Chicago Gold-Digger, I can only say that she is a very savvy gold-digger.  Certainly marrying the man who cheated on you, gave you a disease, and who you kicked out after (due to your gold-digging) he ended up broker than the ten commandments on a Sunday morning, now that takes balls and brains.  Here Manwhore is with his newly found riches, just waiting to run back into your money hungry arms, and you open your legs wide and freely.

What will be really interesting to find out is whether he invites me to the wedding.  LOL

Happy humping my friends.  Happy humping.

35 Reasons you might be rejected by the Preacher’s Daughters

These are all based on real men whom Fallen Angel and I have either:  gone out on at least one date with, talked to, or have been contacted by on dating websites.  A couple of these I actually married, but later divorced.  This is only the tip of the iceberg though.  My sister and I were able to rattle off this list in about fifteen minutes.  As we listed them I typed it into my phone.  I plan on adding more to it as time goes on, and as the memories return to us.

1. Pretty but dumb as a box of rocks
2. No ambition
3. Poor
4. Player
5. Acts like a twelve-year-old
6. Ball-less
7. Doesn’t own a car and lives outside of a major city
8. Sends four texts for every one you send
9. Admits on his profile to being molested, and outs his sister as also being molested as a child
10. Secretly gay
11. Raised by the mafia
12. Con artist
13. You ask for a hammer and he hangs up on you
14. Not mechanically inclined
15. Atheist
16. Too religious
17. Just got out of prison
18. Crazy baby mama
19. Crazy ex-wife/girlfriend
20. Has too many kids by too many women
21. Has too many kids
22. Gets high too much
23. Too much facial hair
24. Needs more facial hair
25. Doesn’t shower on a daily basis
26. Spends four nights a week playing pool at bars, yet doesn’t drink or gamble
27. Lives with parents/family
28. Talks too much
29. Excessive drinking
30. Superhero syndrome
31. Posts on profile that he’s “in a relationship”
32. Has his girlfriend/wife message you on the dating site requesting “group fun”
33. Extreme mood swings
34. Unacceptable in bed (dick too big, too small, too kinky, not kinky enough, selfish, or just sucks in bed)
35. Pedophile

Created using Out of Milk, http://outofmilk.com/android

If you would like to know more about any particular one, or if you agree with Fallen Angel that we should add the full stories and turn it into a book, please leave us a comment below.   I’m trying to lure her into the world of blogging, so any help would be much appreciated.

Happy humping!

Love & Sex Q&A #11

11

Have you ever felt that your involvement with your partner was more hard work than fun?  If so, do you feel this is to be expected or is a sign that something basic is wrong?

This is an appropriate question for me now.  Since I’ve been obsessing over Art so much lately, and it unfortunately reminds me of how I was with Manwhore in the beginning, this is something I really needed to explore.  I also haven’t answered any of these questions in a while and didn’t want you to think I had abandoned my little pink book.

I do sometimes feel that the relationships that I’m in or have been in are entirely too much work and not worth the effort.  I always wonder whether it’s a sign that the feelings I have for a person are not shared.  I wrote once about being the moth or the flame.  I still believe that that’s a great way of looking at it because if only one person in a relationship is the moth, then it’s probably not going to work out.  Unless both people are both the moth and the flame, meaning both are attracted to one another and both are drawing the other in, it’s just not going to last.

In all honesty though, that’s very difficult to find, or at least for me it has been.  Either men are really attracted to me, but I’m not that attracted to them, or vice versa.  It’s enough to drive a girl crazy sometimes.

My relationship with Art is still new and in the infant stage.  I am definitely the moth.  I know that much for sure.  It’s not that I am not physically attracted to a lot of men, because I am.  However, I am rarely attracted to a man to this degree not only physically, but mentally, emotionally, and creatively.

When I was with LL Cool Bean, I liked him because he was so nice and down to earth, but I just couldn’t reach that level of physical attraction that I need.  I also had a problem dealing with his immaturity, and because of that I had a hard time opening up to him emotionally.  I had the same problem with my ex-husband, the Ox.  He was intelligent and a good person, but it was like we were on different levels mentally.  The same can also be said for Bobblehead Nerd and Skaterboi.

On the other hand I have been with some guys who I found very attractive, but were either assholes, drunks or idiots such as BSL, EB, and Yankee Cowboy to list just a few.  In fact, after I broke with Yankee Cowboy and moved back down South I swore that I would never go out with a “pretty boy” again.  They were just too much trouble and upkeep.  I decided that average looking guys were what I needed.  I was wrong.

I know I tend to be shallow when it comes to what I find physically attractive, but I also try to look past the physical and see a person for who they are.  Unfortunately, that isn’t always enough.  It needs to be a package deal.  Art is the package deal.  I know that’s a bold statement to make so soon, but it’s obvious not only to me but to everyone around me.  Now if I can just figure out if I’m not just his moth, but also his flame.

I did decide to go with him to visit his kids this weekend.  If I can’t figure all this out by the end of our weekend together, then I really do have some serious issues going on.  LOL  Wish me luck!

Happy humping!